When quitting porn, we often think we need discipline or commitment, as well as motivation. And a lot of people think these are actually the same things. But the truth is, motivation is not required. And if that sounds counterintuitive, you really need to listen in today.
Motivation...
One question that always comes up for my clients around urges is what to do when your urges seem to keep coming back. Learning to process and allow urges is a big portion of the work I do with clients, but this urge flow means that the desire to view pornography is always going to return....
Today I want to share with you a principle that has helped me so much in my own life, and also it’s the thing my clients say has helped them the most in overcoming their porn habit. In fact, every time I get a comment on the podcast or an email from a listener who is struggling, I...
Sometimes when people are new to me, they wonder how I can be sex-positive while also helping people quit their porn habit. So, I think it’s important to dive into this a little bit today because shame around sexuality is the one thing that keeps most people going back to pornography...
We’ve talked about describing your porn habit as an addiction before on the podcast. It’s so easy to categorize our behavior as an addiction, but the truth is, when we think we’re addicted, we leave ourselves feeling disempowered and without agency. And today, I think...
“I messed up again…” I get messages from clients and listeners all the time saying something along these lines. People are confused about why it happened, and then they have difficulty processing the emotion that they experience after slipping up and viewing porn. If this...
How many of you feel deprived when you resist the temptation to view pornography? Of course you do. The hard work of overcoming porn is not just ignoring your urges. All you have done is decide not to look at it. But you still want to look at it. And it’s this feeling of deprivation that...
There is no doubt about it; quitting pornography is an incredibly difficult thing to do. We know that nothing worth having comes easily, and because you’ve used porn to buffer against negative emotions for so long, there is so much discomfort to deal with when deciding to break the habit....
I’ll preface this by letting you all know that I am not an iceberg expert. However, I do know that we only see 10% of an iceberg, while the rest of it lives out of sight. And the same is true of your pornography habit. There is always so much more going on that isn’t...
If you’re someone who feels shame when you find yourself wanting to view pornography, this episode is for you. So many of my clients feel guilt and other negative emotions around their sexual urges. So, this week, we’re unpacking what these urges are, what they mean, and most...
So far on the podcast, I’ve taught you a lot of the science behind habit-reformation and how your brain is working. But in this episode, I’m talking about your pornography habit from the perspective that really matters: God’s.
One thing I see with clients and listeners who are...
How do you imagine you’ll feel when you finally quit your porn habit? You might romanticize being on the other side, feeling amazing, committed, and whole… but I’m here to warn you that this isn’t quite how it’s going to go.
Something that might catch you by...
